Tony Sartain, mba, ne

niche programming and process control

Good evening, and welcome. All the information on this site was current at the moment you arrived. The content updates continuously (per load) without the help of Internet monkeys. Absolutely everything you're seeing is generated by code developed TOTALLY inhouse. No commercial website software is in use. NOTE: You can click on the bright spot inside the lens flair to disable the fruitfly. If it doesn't annoy you, perhaps you're weird.  [ ... more in the Technology section ]

Today is Tuesday, the 1st day of September and the 243rd day of 2026. Most of the contiguous United States is observing Daylight Saving Time (DST) at the moment. It will end on November 1st at 2:00 AM when clocks "fall back" one hour. While many countries observe DST, the beginning and ending dates and times vary, so as to add another layer of confusion to the scheme.

On the Jewish calendar, today is the 19th day of Elul in the year 5786. We are under a waning gibbous moon. At the time you accessed this page, its exact age was 20 days, 2 hours, and 22 minutes. We will be under a new moon again on Friday, September 11th at 9:55 AM. The next full moon will occur on Saturday, September 26th at 4:17 AM. For now, Mars, Saturn and Jupiter are visible in the night sky. Mercury can be seen in the eastern sky just before dawn. Looking into the night sky, far beyond our Solar System neighbors, we see that we are under the sign of Virgo. For today, our sunrise and sunset times (at -96.852/32.847) are 6:55 AM and 7:41 PM, giving us 12 hours and 46 minutes of daylight.

There are 21 days until the end of summer, marked by the Vernal, or Autumnal, Equinox. On the day of the Equinox, the sun can be observed to be directly above the equator, and the night and day are the same length. The actual crossing of the sun over the equator takes approximately two and a half days. The equinox occurs halfway through the transit when the center of the sun is directly over the equator. This year, the exact crossing time will be 9:51 am Greenwich Mean Time on Sunday, September 23rd.

On this day in 1897, the Tremont Street Subway in Boston opened, becoming the first underground rapid transit system in North America.

Today we celebrate the birthdays of Henry II (1588), Johann Pachelbel (1653), Elizabeth Harrison (1849), Edgar Rice Burroughs (1875), Yvonne DeCarlo (1922), Vittorio Gassman (1922), Rocky Marciano (1923), Conway Twitty (1933), Seiji Ozawa (1935), Lily Tomlin (1939), Barry Gibb (1946), Dr. Phil McGraw (1950), Gloria Estefan (1957), and J.D. Fortune (1973).

We went to a Southern Baptist church. When I was a small child, until I was about eight or nine years old, I worried if I didn't go forward and get saved every Sunday, which I couldn't do--it was absolutely too humiliating to see these adults flailing and beating their breasts and sobbing, and I thought, Oh, my God, this is so ridiculous, so embarrassing. I could never bring myself to go forward. And I'd think, Oh, my God, if I don't go next Sunday, if the end of the world comes, I'll go to hell. And that's a pretty hard thing for a 7- or 8-year-old to carry all the time.

Lily Tomlin, born on this day 87 years ago in Detroit



The Technology

This site is a working demonstration of on-demand PHP scripting. The code tightly integrates computed data with text, spewing forth natural-sounding narrative output with flawless grammar and syntax. The narrative sections--which all change daily--are from an in-house database. The real time data is derived [and rendered] primarily by PHP code at the time the output is generated at the Linux/Apache server.

About the fruitfly: Whether the fruitfly in the margin entertains or annoys, it serves a very real and useful purpose. The fly uses recently developed sentinelware. In short, the image is generated by the output of many, many active server monitoring processes. When abnormal server activity is detected by the "fly system," the fly's appearance deviates from the default, and a system exception raises a flag that is immediately addressed by the humans who monitor the server via the fruitfly's movements and morphology. Until fairly recently, server issues weren't always obvious, and if so, isolating and mending them was an arduous exercise. The fruitfly technology has made the plight of the server technician much more bearable. If the fruitfly annoys you, click in the center of the lens flare to swat it.



Contact Information

Email: tony@tonysartain.com
Cell: 903-360-0002

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